Happy birthday to my beloved grandma/popo

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 Grandma has been a huge impact in my first 10 years of my life. I remember every moment. When she passed i cried alot. I miss her alot til today i think of her everyday. When she left i had hard times facing the future and fact that shes gone. I keep thinking shes with me and all the time i feel her presences around. Until i gave up on around this time 2015 i was diagnosed with psychosis. I was hospitalised for 9 weeks. I don't want to tell anyone the truth about my mental illness if its real diagnosis or its not real at all. 

Alot of time i find myself mesmerising my childhood and try to reconnect those moments. But its not real at all. What i experience is mental episodes where i am stuck in the past. Have not let go alot of things and its keeping me from living my life. I don't think anyone's death i have experience has such an impact in my life but my grandma. 

I just miss her alot. 


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